This Floating Excrement Was Far Too Symbolic! These Are the Television Letdowns of the Year.

As we consider the television landscape of the recent year, a selection of series emerge not for their brilliance, but for their notable shortcomings. Ranging from cringe-inducing spin-offs to confusingly poor docuseries, here are the productions that had us scratching our heads or just reaching for the remote.

And Just Like That

How to start with this love/hate follow-up? Burdened with woeful scripts, painful character development (we demand better for Miranda!), and a mere 71 seconds of beloved Samantha, the show struggled to find its footing. For a moment, as the final series started, it seemed as if it had finally hit its stride. Then came an episode all about Seema’s natural deodorant. Little surprise the creator announced this would be the last season. It ended on a low point; the closeup of Miranda’s loo full of poo was simply too on-the-nose. Still, fans undeniably found joy picking apart every single “what on earth?” moment. And as Carrie – a single woman once more – danced around her sprawling townhouse to Barry White, who couldn't release a small sob?

All’s Fair

‘Is Kim Kardashian an actress? The answer is a resounding no.’

But that was practically the least of this drama's problems. The recipient of a exceedingly uncommon no-star review, it was difficult to know where to start listing the problems. The laughably wooden writing? The tedious veneration of affluence and consumption? The almost wilful procession of cliches? Acting so poor they felt almost spiteful? Let’s just say “all of the above” and forget about this show again. Except, a second season has been commissioned, so we’re likely going to have to.

AKA Charlie Sheen

Considering the legal troubles, abuse allegations and fatherly shortcomings, it’s fair to say Charlie Sheen has been a bad boy. Not you’d truly have known it from this multi-part docuseries which smirked its way at Sheen’s various bouts of self-destructive hedonism while failing to tell us a single thing we weren't already aware of. Instead, it felt as if this loose cannon was being pandered to, so any pity this series might evoke should be saved for the people who have had to endure close contact with this charming but flippant egotist.

The Iris Affair

Of course we understood it was ridiculous from the get-go: a thriller about a AI known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either save the world – or annihilate all of humanity. We stuck with it out of sheer love for its leads … but by the end, it felt like even they had stopped bothering. One scarcely reacted when his character died, and the other ultimately slicing Charlie with an axe … in painfully slow-motion. That's what you call giving up the ghost.

The Gangster Drama

Shady figures meeting in empty boxing gyms? The Prodigy’s Firestarter blaring in club scenes? The late 90s called and demands its gangland drama back.

In truth, that is harsh on the gangland dramas of the late 90s. Many seem a little dated now, but at least they didn’t suffer the embarrassment of having to accommodate unconvincing accents. But there were many other issues. Mainly that it was just profoundly boring; a conflict over drug-selling territory between various London picaresques which seemed a bit basic.

With Love, Meghan

Given the extent to which she grinds the gears of the nation’s performatively enraged commentators, it’s almost tempting to applaud the Duchess of Sussex’s televised ventures into twee homemaking as deliberate provocations. But then you watch them and are compelled to concede that in this case, they might have a point. It’s like watching a homeware magazine come to life; a meme for wine o’clock with delusions of grandeur; a parade of sleeping dogs, buzzing beehives, sentimental platitudes and forgettable crafting “tips” you’ll not remember instantly. All underpinned by vast, largely unearned wealth. Ugh.

The Beckham Documentary

There are obviously fascinating things to be said about regarding Victoria Beckham and her journey with career, identity, self-acceptance. But for some reason, this documentary series opted not to say them. Rather, the viewing was like consuming a marketing catalogue. She obviously has every right to resent what she describes as her “stern” image. But sadly, she failed to do herself any favours with this guarded non-event of a series.

The Inheritance

It should have been the next cultural phenomenon – except even more extravagant, with a glamorous star as a deceased benefactor and a sharp-tongued personality managing her estate. What more could you ask for? As contestants battled it out, there was plenty of backstabbing and squabbling. But the rules quickly became incomprehensible: it’s even now too complicated to explain what exactly was happening. Even more disappointingly, we only saw glimpses of the star via prerecorded videos. The series ended up reeking of a production that was straining desperately to live up to something way beyond it.

The Lena Dunham Romcom

How does one follow a show that captured a generation? The pressure was enormous for this glitzy romcom about Jessica, a hopeful New Yorker who lands in London with a shattered romance. The star took her biggest role by the horns and was a delight to watch, reveling in Austen levels of romantic ideals. But it was all very glossy and, ironically, was insufficient. Plus, the sheer amount of famous friends involved felt uncomfortable.

Mitchell & Webb Are Not Helping

Not good enough to be ‘patchy’.

Given the smart inclusion of gifted younger comics, hopes were high. But sadly, most of it didn’t land. A recurring sketch was a single joke stretched to a husk but repeated in every episode. One star seemed too ready to slip into a familiar ranting mode. The behind-the-scenes sketches, in contrast, simply provoked the idea that they should probably have stayed in there a bit longer.

The Twisted Tale of Amanda Knox

This dramatisation of the story of Amanda Knox was executive produced by Amanda Knox and pretty much exclusively presented the perspective of Amanda Knox. So, while there undoubtedly is an interesting drama to be made about the horrific 2007 murder, this isn’t it. The subject matter needed to be handled sensitively. Rather, the series struggled painfully to find the right voice, lurching from oddly breezy, somewhat stylised farce to inevitably, real-life horror. Twisted? Perhaps. A total mess? Absolutely.

Prime Target

We admire the lead actor … but did we buy him playing the most brilliant maths genius since, a man so smart he’s on the brink of a discovery that could destabilise society? Nope! This international thriller about secret services spying on – and eliminating – intellectuals frankly got more farcical by the second. Silliness-by-numbers.

1000 Men and Me: The Bonnie Blue Story

This uncritical portrait followed the content creator notorious for explicit exploits as she undertook her biggest feat yet. What on earth would motivate her? What we wanted was far greater interrogation of her true psyche, plus those of the men in the queue. They could at least have spoken to the now-famous mum who appeared to haul her son away from the queue. What we got was horrific imagery and absolutely no critical analysis of her infamy whatsoever. It's staggering to consider, the documentary-maker has a teenage daughter too.